Monday, September 26, 2011

Gratitude

Gratitude=Great Attitude

And my dear friend Christine is talking gratitude today over at www.welcometomybrain.net

You should check it out. I realized I have never shared my daily gratitude practice.

Warning: its hard.

My daughter has struggled HARD since August. HARD. Pee, Rage, scratching, biting, defiant, and plain ol' rude.

I am glad to report that she is doing 100 percent better at her new school this week! She loves it. The teacher says she has tried some of her techniques, but has been flexible and has had zero outbursts. So from one a day to none.

She is doing fine in common areas like the all school library time each morning and rocking in afterschool.

But approaching her in a positive, playful way during the days when she is being mean spiteful and obstinate.... Not so easy.

So during the first few months, when her rage was the largest, I made a challenge for myself. I now challenge you to try it.

Every day before I go to sleep I say "I love it when Baby __________". Something, anything! Could be "gives me a five second reprieve between fits!" "Refrains from biting during a rage!" Or on better days "draws me a picture!" "Gives me a hug!"

Then I say " I am grateful for my child because__________". Whatever. Again whatever I can think of that day. Even if its be cause "I never would have met Christine Moers, or Christie, or Gale, or Rachael!". I never would have known how awesome a grandpa my dad is! Or because " she completes me!"

THIS IS HARD TO ON MANY DAYS. But it is. VITAL.

Why is it vital? Because my child can not bond with me unless I love her unconditionally. She can not and will not attach if I don't love her with out fail. Every. Single. Day. Attachment and bonding is a two way street. And as the healthy person in this equation- I give more. And I sustain myself with gratitude when she isn't open to love.

Some days my only gratitude is:
I am so so grateful that my child is here with me and no longer being abused or neglected. I am grateful she is HOME.
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